Category Archives: Humour

Just Step Sideways: Dee Dee Ramone’s Hip Hop Career

How many drugs are too many drugs? Well, many people may not know this, but lovable goofball Dee Dee Ramone, bass player for the legendary NY punks, had a brief side project as Dee Dee King in 1989. In a deleted scene from the Ramones biopic End Of The Century directed by Michael Gramagia andContinue reading “Just Step Sideways: Dee Dee Ramone’s Hip Hop Career”

Quentin Smirhes v the Fisher Price Box

He is a rum one, that Quentin Smirhes. Mustard of knitwear, mercurial of mood, you never quite know what to expect from him. He is a little tetchy, sans tea and custard creams, of an afternoon. So we thought a toy jack in the box would be tickety-boo to lift his mood. We were wrong,Continue reading “Quentin Smirhes v the Fisher Price Box”

The Joy Of Kenneth

Drink up your strawberry Nesquik/Creamola Foam, finish the last crumbs of Findus Crispy Pancakes, peas and oven chips, and make a spirited dash to the wood-panelled TV set. It’s Kenneth time! Not a Kenny, most certainly not a Ken, Kenneth is a benign, smiling presence in a world of doubt. He’s crimplene- lean, a clean,Continue reading “The Joy Of Kenneth”

The Great Scottish Diet

Nothing brings a Proustian rush of nostalgia quite like the consumption of sugary Scottish snacks. Tunnocks Tea Cakes are a popular one, after decades, made with either mallow, jam and chocolate, or chocolate and whipped icing sugar, depending on which option you go for. Either way, it’s diabetes on a plate. This goes for ourContinue reading “The Great Scottish Diet”

My First All Emoji Review: Dig! (2004)

❤️🎥📽️☢️🎧🎤🎹🎙️🎻🎺⭐🤩📀🤑💲💲💲 🎸🎵🎼➕🎨🚩🚩🚩🚩💊💊💊💊💊💊💊💊💊💊💉💉💉💉💉😠😠😠😡😡😡😡😡😒😒🤬🤬🔥🔥🔥🔥💥💥💥💥🧔👦 ⭐⭐⭐🥃🥃🥃🥃🍾🔪🌎🎉🎉⭐⭐⭐👅🗣️🗣️💪💪🤥😵😬🤒🤒🤒🤒😜😜😜💊💊💊💉💉💉 🎼🎼🎼🎵🎵🤒😵😜🚛🚛😠📀📀🍸🤑🤑🤑🤑😥😥😠🤔🤔😍🤩🤩🤩🙂🙂⭐⭐⭐🎹🎧🎤🎸 🎻🎬🎸🎸🎺🎷🎸❤️❤️❤️💯🎉👋👋👋

Slang King

It’s been four years since Mark Edward Smith passed away and I can’t think of many curmudgeons who inspired so many bands and people, despite being such a divisive figure (Moz, maybe). My favourite lyrics by Smith can also be found in some of my favourite Fall songs. He’s particularly scathing when it comes toContinue reading “Slang King”

Oh! Brother Podcast

You have probably gathered by now (especially if you read our previous blog The Tempo House) that we’re fans of The (Mighty) Fall. So I thought it was time to write about the podcast which references all things concerning The Fall, Oh! Brother. Hosted by the band’s classic rhythm section, Paul and Steve Hanley, theyContinue reading “Oh! Brother Podcast”

Generic White Middle-Class Performance Poet

I’m getting so bored of this crap that I thought I’d homage them myself. Took me roughly three minutes. Ooh, it’s enough to make you spit out your flat white in Costa Coffee. Generic White Middle-Class Performance Poet I’m jabbing at you Jabbing with my ire With my flat tyre Flat out, tired Well-worn dropletsContinue reading “Generic White Middle-Class Performance Poet”