Panto, pantomime in its shortened form (like porno, ha ha ha!) is where kids in the UK often first witness theatre. Sadly, it’s often the ONLY theatre they ever see, because it’s mostly bloody awful. Don’t fight me on this, I’ve been a critic almost fifteen years now, and have seen more panto than many, many people. What, lovely readers from across the pond and beyond, is panto, you may enquire?
Well, it developed from “commedia dell’arte”, an Italian masked theatre, prevalent between the 16th-18th century, which spread to Europe. But broadly speaking, in 2024, you can find panto everywhere in the UK, from small rural areas to big cities. They range from amateur productions to large, glitzy capers with pop songs blasting out, featuring stars from soaps and sitcoms dressed up like dames, baddies or cats.
The storyline will inevitably be based on a classic children’s tale (Aladdin, Peter Pan, Cinderella,etc) but always breaking the fourth wall with innuendo, asides to the audience and even the plugging of a local car showroom, because the car dealer put up some money as sponsorship. It will get rowdy, it will be bawdy, and candy will be thrown. Villains will twirl their moustaches and be roundly boo-ed off the stage, to their delight. I remember Darren Brownlie, a lovely actor based in Glasgow, nearly losing his shit when a room full of brownie guides heckled him. His giggles lasted nearly as long as his standing ovation.
The bad? People forgetting their lines and stumbling about like a drunk toddler. The amateur stuff can be dire, but so too can the supposed pros, who think they’re above all this sort of thing, like when Donald Trump doesn’t understand minimum wage, and starts using word salad to paper over the cracks.
The good? Any panto with jokes that are perfectly pitched to all ages, and which take a postmodern approach. This is generally found with Glasgow grand dame, Johnny McKnight, who peppers his scripts with really clever wordplay, and does jokes about Charlie XCX and Alan Cumming, while understanding sweetness and sentiment can exist in smart narratives without tooth rot.
I’m not covering panto this year (osteoarthritis is the real villain of the season here) but I’m hoping something will delight and surprise me next.As the traditional shout out goes, “Oh yes, it will!”
Hit The North 